Miami GP Recap
The Crypto.com Miami Grand Prix has come and gone. Jesus Christ was it something. I’m gonna start this off by stating that I was at the Grand Prix on Saturday for the Sprint Race and Qualifying so I got a good boots on the ground analysis for the people. A lot of drama happened at this Grand Prix and I will be going over every single inch of what happened on track and off it. Let’s dive in.
Friday was quite uneventful as it only had one practice session and the Sprint Shootout to set the grid for Saturday’s Sprint. Max Verstappen was on pole and the only thing of note on Friday was Daniel Ricciardo qualifying 4th for the Sprint. Besides this Friday was a snooze fest.
Moving onto Saturday. Saturday started out the day with the Sprint at 12 o’clock while half of Miami was still asleep which made the seating arrangements quite nice. Lando was knocked out in turn one by Lance Stroll who was hit by Fernando who was pushed by Lewis. I think we can just blame Lance here and move on with our day. The Sprint Race brought us tons of action and chaos from the first lap all the way to the last. Daniel Ricciardo had everyone believing he was back to his true form as he battled and fought off Carlos Sainz and Oscar Piastri to hold onto 4th place. Lewis Hamilton and Kevin Magnessun had a brawl for many laps, almost colliding at turn 11 multiple times. Lewis would finally get past K-Mag and fight with Yuki for that last point in the Sprint which transpired on the final lap when Lewis overtook the Japanese driver. To TeamLH’s horrors though, Lewis would catch a hefty penalty for speeding in the pitlane which took away his hard fought point. Lando would catch a fine for running across the track totalling 25,000 pounds and Fernando had some choice words about Lewis after the Sprint as well.
Now after the Sprint we had to wait in the hot sun for three hours before we got Qualifying which was the same as it’s been all year. Daniel Ricciardo shit the bed and made his return to the back of the field getting outqualified by his teammate. Both Alpines somehow made it into the top 15 which was a big surprise considering where they started this season. The rest of Qualifying went the usual way as Max took pole and Charles was P2. Quali was fun but by the end of it I was covered in sweat and wanting to kill myself due to the heat. Took seven years to leave the track and by the time I got back to where I was staying, Quali had finished two hours ago. I do not know if this is like this at every track but I can say from my experience that it fucking sucked. Tons of people passing out left and right from heat exhaustion made me happy I’m not some fat sleazeball who doesn’t exercise. I digress, the Miami GP was something to behold. Tons of famous athletes and celebrities left and right having zero clue about anything Formula One related. This specific spectacle had Europe once again in outrage claiming this GP is damaging to the sport so on and so forth. Tons of wannabe influencers and fashionistas alike is what we really should be talking about. The amount of people wearing some fashion brand or dressed like a fucking idiot I saw walking up and down the track was insane. There were a good percent, maybe 30-35%, of the people walking the roads who were there and you could just tell they have zero clue or interest about what is occurring on track. This is where the problem was for me. I hate the fact that real fans who did not get the chance to go or had to settle for some shitty seats because the prices of tickets is extremely inflated due to these dumb wannabe famous fucks. Now some might say this is gatekeeping or whatever but I do not care.
Moving onto the race. Now instead of paying thousands for the same seat on Sunday that I acquired for Saturday I decided to watch the race at home so I could pay my rent. This race was without a doubt the best one we have had all year. Sergio Perez is showing his true colors and as I predicted, is starting his decline into being jobless by almost killing Max Verstappen in turn one. Oscar Piastri had one hell of a race until he met Carlos Sainz on the back straight and took him out. Oscar is one hell of a driver and to think he had the pace he had with only half the upgrades as Lando is wild. K-Mag gained more penalty points putting him even closer to a race ban when he murdered Logan Sargeants career bringing out a safety car. Alpine gained their first point after almost killing each other and starting another French revolution on the first lap. Lewis got his highest finishing position of the season with a 6th place finish. Now onto Lando. I have been a big hater of Lando in the past. I should give him his flowers and celebrate him for getting his first race win. As much as that would be appropriate I simply cannot do that. I will never apologize for what I have said about Lando in the past and will continue to believe in my takes. Lando did a good job building a gap to Max off the restart and did well enough to secure the win. That’s all I am going to say positively about him. I still do not believe him to be this “Champion in waiting” every analyst and girl under 15 has dubbed him to be. I still think he is an ignorant asshole. I still think he will always be second fiddle to Max. I still think that he will be outperformed by Oscar. I still cannot stand his fans on social media. And last but finally not least, I still think half the grid is better than him given they were in the same situation with the same car. Lando Norris got lucky. Lightning does not strike the same place twice or whatever that saying is. Lando faithful go fuck yourself. Good day.
Picture of the year
